Why in Some Countries, Marriages Are Arranged by The Parents - IELTS Task 2 Band 9 Sample Essays

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Model Essay 1

Marriage practices vary across cultures: in some societies parents arrange unions, while elsewhere individuals select their own partners. I contend that, although arranged marriages can offer social stability and practical safeguards, choosing one’s partner generally produces healthier, more resilient relationships. I will first weigh the pragmatic benefits and limitations of arranged matches, then argue that personal choice—tempered by family support and emotional maturity—better serves long-term marital success.

Arranged marriages often arise from sensible motives: families vet prospects, assess socioeconomic compatibility, and ensure shared cultural or religious values, which can reduce friction and provide robust support networks. In many South Asian communities, for example, parental involvement lessens financial risk and leverages communal experience to avoid incompatible pairings. However, this system can suppress individual autonomy and overlook emotional compatibility—factors that are crucial for intimacy and mutual growth. When spouses lack preexisting rapport or the freedom to voice preferences, resentment and poor communication may fester, undermining the very stability that arranged unions aim to secure.

Allowing individuals to choose their partners prioritises psychological fit and voluntary commitment, which are strong predictors of marital satisfaction. People who select mates based on shared goals, temperament, and conflict-resolution styles are more likely to develop effective communication patterns and equitable partnerships. Critics argue that youthful impulsiveness can lead to ill-judged matches, yet such risks are mitigated when choice is balanced with parental wisdom, open dialogue, and premarital counselling. Contemporary examples show couples who marry for love but retain family ties often enjoy both emotional fulfilment and practical support—combining the best aspects of autonomy and communal oversight.

In sum, while arranged marriages deliver structural advantages, they frequently sacrifice individual agency and emotional compatibility. Marriages founded on informed personal choice—supported, not supplanted, by family guidance—offer a superior foundation for enduring partnership and mutual flourishing.

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Model Essay 2

In many societies, marriage is either orchestrated by parents or decided independently by the couple themselves. While both approaches can lead to lasting unions, I firmly believe that self-selected marriages are generally superior because they cultivate stronger emotional compatibility and encourage shared responsibility. This essay will first examine how arranged marriages prioritise collective interests at the expense of personal understanding, and then explore how individual choice fosters deeper commitment, more equitable decision-making, and long-term relational resilience.

Arranged marriages, though often grounded in familial wisdom, frequently prioritise social cohesion and reputational considerations over genuine emotional insight between partners. Families may focus on aligning economic status, caste, or communal expectations, presuming compatibility from similarity rather than assessing how two individuals actually interact. This can create a veneer of harmony while masking unresolved personal differences. For instance, couples who meet only briefly before engagement may enter marriage without insight into each other’s conflict-management style, ambitions, or boundaries. Such gaps can lead to miscommunication and dependency on family intermediaries whenever disagreements arise. Although advocates argue that family-curated matches minimise risk, this system can unintentionally foster emotional distance and restrict couples from negotiating important issues independently, undermining the formation of an authentic partnership.

By contrast, marriages formed through personal choice typically promote a deeper sense of joint accountability and mutual understanding, which are crucial for navigating the realities of adult life. When partners select each other based on shared values, emotional rapport, and long-term aspirations, they enter the union with a clearer awareness of strengths and vulnerabilities. This makes it easier to develop cooperative habits such as transparent communication, financial planning, and equitable household roles. Critics claim that self-chosen marriages are overly influenced by idealism or temporary attraction; however, contemporary trends suggest that couples who make intentional decisions—such as discussing future goals, negotiating boundaries, and resolving conflict before marriage—build relationships that are more adaptive and self-sustaining. Emotional compatibility established through genuine choice becomes a stabilising force that reduces reliance on external mediation.

In conclusion, although arranged marriages aim to protect family interests, they often limit the development of authentic interpersonal understanding. Marriages based on personal selection, grounded in emotional awareness and shared responsibility, provide a more reliable foundation for durable, fulfilling relationships.

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